Saturday, June 5, 2010

things uttered today

  • at 6:20 am: "yes, asher, you can have pepperoni pizza for breakfast."
  • at the dollar store: "asher, what do you want for a treat?" "i want one of dese, mommy" (points to an ice cream sandwich) "perfect!" "oh, mommy, i not want dat. i want candy." sigh "ok, hunnybun, you can have that blow-pop instead."
  • at the grocery store: "thanks, blithe. we could use that coupon for whipped cream. hmm... how many should i buy?"
  • "EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!" as asher runs - literally! - around the entire superstore. i'm not even joking. the whole store. running. usually away from me or right in front of someone else's cart.
  • "mommy, i hab dis?" as asher hands me a Yop that he grabbed while helping blithe to pick up some whipped cream.
  • "please, God, let this be high in fat... what?! only 3g of fat?!?! well, every little bit counts, i guess."
  • "please, God, let the all-beef hot dogs have more fat than the regular ones." fyi, all-beef hot dogs have less fat than the regular ones. guess which ones we got?
  • "why is homo milk $1 more than 2%?!?! ok, fine, i'll just get 2%, and mix it with table cream. it's got 18%. that will have to do."
  • "why is all the yogurt and sour cream and cottage cheese low fat?! i want as high fat as possible!!"
  • "no, i'm not buying those pudding cups. i'm going to get some instant pudding, because i can make that with cream."
  • "EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!" asher, still running throughout the store.
  • "i'll go get him, mommy." "thank-you, blithe."
  • "put me down!!" shrieked as blithe carried the paced single-ventricle heart kid from the next aisle back to our cart in the freezer aisle, where i was contemplating ice cream and Carnation instant breakfast (which is expensive, by the way!!).
  • "ok, which beans have the most fat? oh, wait, i have beans at home, and i can cook those up and mix in some butter when i give them to him."
  • "oh, wow, what a great price for crushed tomatoes! they're non-fat, but i can mix some polycose and olive oil into the sauce, and butter his pasta. perfect!"
  • at home: "look, mommy, i hab cheese!"
  • "asher, did you drink your yop already?" "oh, yes, mommy, i did!" i'm not joking. that's how he answered, all sing-songy and with a smile.
  • "yes, asher, absolutely, you can have ice cream for supper."
  • "asher, do you want a second hot dog with cheese?" "oh, yes, please, mommy."
  • "mommy, i hab more ice cream?" "yes, you can. you ate some of each of your hot dogs, so you can have some more ice cream."
 i'm not even exaggerating here. these are actual, direct quotes from today. this is just messed up. LOL


Mom said...

I guess this is the "new normal" with you and the kiddies for a while, at least until Asher puts on a few pounds. Maybe Bram could put on a few too, for that matter. lol

Allison said...

Let me know when you will be nearby again - I have coupons for MILK!!! There you go, it'll ease up the difference in price. For the record - you have met Reggie, we did this same diet for him, and he is a big 'ol bruiser now.

Wendy said...

You can get 6% fat yogurt but you have to get the real, balkan style. I buy it for Chris, then add honey and fruit to sweeten, or toss it in a smoothie. And I LAUGHED at your comments about foods because I've been there, that's how I started out shopping for high fat foods for Chris too and it felt ridiculous and insane to be reading labels trying to buy the highest fat possible for the kid. Sadly (seriously) it will become second nature and you will just KNOW what is highest fat :) Just know it's not forever, he'll start eating and gaining soon!

Kerri said...

I think I may just have to start Mary Clare on Asher's diet! :) Let me know how fast it adds the lb's.

Love "freaxious," my new favorite word! You are too funny, and dead on it! Love it!


Heather said...

that's true! ;) so far, i'm really enjoying his diet. we had chocolate pudding with whipped cream for breakfast today. LOL why am i putting "lol"? i'm not joking. that was our breakfast. and yesterday for brekkie, he had a chocolate bar. LOL man, it's good to be a heart mom! ;)

and good call on the enchies with guac. i'll have to whip up some tortillas and find some sauce, but it never even occured to me to make that. steph, you're a genius!!! :)

Carolina Carters said...

OMG, that is hilarious!! I'm sure that's what one of our days will sound like as soon as our son can talk.

I'm Shannon, and I'm new here. I'm not exactly sure how I came across your blog, but I'm glad I did! :) We have a single ventricle little guy named Derrick who is 13 months old. I look for the fattiest (I guess that's a word) stuff I can find to feed him, and he'll choose fruit if given the choice! Lol! The heart's an interesting one! :)

Enjoy those yummy foods...I'll be back to read up on Asher's history. He's a cutie!